A Cultural Phenomenon: What Will People Say?

By Syeda Fatima Shahid

This cultural phenomenon of “what will people say” is the most common yet hurtful question for a woman. The question depicts that others’ opinions matter more than your wants and desires. Surviving as a woman in our society is already challenging, and we’re often judged by questions like “What will people say?” We’re not free to make our own choices, follow our own paths, or break away from outdated stereotypes. Society sets limits for women, and crossing those boundaries makes people worried. Our parents, afraid of what others might think, push us to fit in and follow strict rules. This pressure makes us give up our dreams and hurts our happiness and confidence. Instead focusing on what makes us happy, we end up seeking approval from others.

Let’s look into some stereotypes that trigger “what will people say”. In many families educating women holds a negative perception because they see it as a threat to their traditions and cultural practices. They consider that education will spoil or give them unlimited freedom. According to such people getting married is more important than education. Even if the girl or her parents wish their daughter to become highly educated and career oriented, the pressure of norms, acceptance from family and their thoughts and comments restrict them doing so.

We all have experienced that how career choices have also become discriminated. People have categorized professions according to genders such as women should choose medical or be in something related to this field. When she shows any interest in some different fields like photography, business or any other then it gets difficult for her. She has to face these mean comments like “this career is not for girls”, “being a doctor gets you more marriage proposals”, “no one in our family has gotten in this profession”. All these conversations pull her back from breaking the unfair trend.

Of course, beauty standards are also in the list. We live in a society where people judge you by your skin color, weight, height, features and clothes. Dark-skinned girls often face unnecessary worry about their appearance.  Society has a narrow view of beauty, and women who don’t fit these standards are criticized. Women who are shorter, darker-skinned, or plus-sized often face prejudice. These specifications have influenced people so much that they have forgotten what real beauty is. Everyone’s worried about how do I achieve that unrealistic figure that people will accept as beautiful. So that no one could say “Use this remedy to get fair”, Lose some weight to look good”, “Your nose is not thin otherwise you are okay”, or “You look so short without heels”.

Lastly, the most heart-wrenching aspect of this cultural phenomenon is when a girl is born and you hear, “Oh another girl now what will people say?”. This mindset is so deeply rooted that even the birth of a girl is also questionable in many families where instead of celebrating and being thankful, they worry about people. They care about the taunts and comments rather than accepting their daughters as a blessing.

For how long are we going to care about what others think? How many times will women have to give up on their dreams? When will this society accept women as they are? It is time to start feeling confident in your skin and believing in your instincts. Stop inculcating gender discrimination in education and careers because women have the right to have them. More importantly, do not hold yourself from the fear of others, do not let people decide what you can do, what you are capable of or, how beautiful you are. You do your best.