A Dilemma for Women: Career or Marriage

By Syeda Fatima Shahid

In Pakistan, despite 45% of women graduating, only 25% pursue careers. What stops them? Why do they choose not to work? Why do they not strive for financial independence? What causes them to abandon their dreams? These questions highlight a dilemma for women as tragic as the reality of our world and the society we live in, where women face difficult choices —often having to decide between marriage and career, both core aspects of their lives.

Societal Pressures and Challenges

Societal pressures and challenges systematically marginalize women in our narrow-minded culture. Despite living in a contemporary society, many families still cling to outdated beliefs, prioritizing marriage and family while pressuring their daughters to conform. What’s worse, these expectations typically apply only to women, not men. Gender roles and cultural norms dictate that men excel in their careers as providers, while women’s “true” role is to ensure a successful marriage by fulfilling household responsibilities and caring for their husbands and children, as it is deemed the only way to gain societal approval.

But why should women prioritize societal approval? This society often makes women’s lives miserable, leaving them feeling helpless and unsafe. When married women dare to pursue careers and attempt to balance work and family responsibilities, their courage and confidence can wane due to unsupportive environments—such as workplaces lacking flexible schedules, unaffordable childcare options, or lack of family support. This imbalance makes achieving work-life balance challenging.

Workplace Challenges

Workplaces should treat everyone equally, based on merit, where wages are determined solely by experience and qualifications. Sadly, gender discrimination persists here too. Women are judged based on their gender and marital status—whether they are single, married, or mothers. They face lower pay, biased promotion and hiring practices, and career setbacks if they take maternity leave or need time off for family responsibilities, resulting in employment gaps.

Economic and Career Perspectives

Women’s careers are often viewed as unstable and insignificant. In some households, husbands recognize the necessity for both partners to work in times of inflation. However, a dilemma for women persists as they typically earn less than men, making their careers appear less lucrative and easily deprioritized in favor of home responsibilities.

All these circumstances contribute to the dilemmas women face—feeling lost, stressed, pressured, and burdened as they struggle to navigate their futures.

Change can occur if the world embraces intellectual diversity, focusing on equality and opportunity. No one should question whether a mother can be a CEO, if a woman wants to study abroad, prioritize her career, remain unmarried, or delay having children.

Let’s create a world where women’s choices are respected, and they are empowered to decide what’s best for themselves. Together, let’s make this world a better place for women.